What time is it? My internal body clock has stopped. Not on the one that goes…”hey honey, lets make a baby!” or the one that says..”Don’t you think it’s time to settle down?” but the one that tells me to wake up at 8am every morning and then lets me go back to sleep ’til 11. I usually fly from California, back to the East coast, and then back to the UK. That makes it a lot easier. This year it was the hardcore 10 hour flight from San Francisco over the Canadian wilderness. The real clock says it’s 3:47am, and I just ate some crisps and a larabar. Hellooo breakfast.
I’ve been getting all these requests for random facts about myself on facebook. Why am I acquiescing and doing your bidding? Cause I’m jet lagged and don’t yet have the brain capacity to do some real work. I could barely spell acquiescing. Hell, I could barely spell barely.
1. When I was a child my mother bought me two ducks as a present. They followed me all around the farm and they….loved me, I believe. After school one day, I came home and they were no longer in the yard….but in the freezer.
2. Once when I was a child I found a key with deer imprinted on it in the woods. I wore it on a chain around my neck and was convinced that I would make me run and jump like a deer. That key was the source of many contusions.
3. I used to bury my jewellery in a field near my house thinking that would make it more valuable. Problem was…I never remembered where I buried it. I miss the Avon snowflake necklace the most.
4. Certain colours of blue remind me of the sky.
5. I think George Clooney is creepy.
6. I’m 4 books behind on my new years resolution to read a book a week for a year.
7. I’ve watched several America’s Next Top Model marathons….and enjoyed them.
8. I once wrote a song called “Set Him On Fire and Watch Him Burn”….a love song.
9. I once wrote a song called “Last Conceited Mother Fucker”….a love song.
10. Since the wheat allergy, I sometimes dream about rolling around on a bed made of croissants.
11. I worked in catering after high school and had to wear a white uniform. I used to wear a black bra and panties to work just to piss off my boss.
12. I love socks.
13. I think most sweet foods are overrated.
14. I’ve been a vegetarian for years, but when I did eat meat it was mostly hot dogs and bologna. Or the slurry of parts, as I liked to call them.
15. My favourite font is not comic sans.
16. I was arrested once and have always secretly wished that I had the mug shot to display. I think I’d want to put it as the centerpiece in one of those multiple picture display mattings.
17. I can be fooled most of the time.
18. I cannot function if underwhelmed or overwhelmed.
19. I’m content for the first time in my life.
20. My contentedness has nothing to do with what I do or don’t own, and everything to do with pizza. I mean, friends.